Have you ever found yourself standing by the water cooler having that deep discussion, with your friends and colleagues, wondering whether the glass of water was half full … or … half empty ???
Hang on to that thought for a minute, I have a Story to share with You first …
… Once upon a time, the wedding of ALL weddings was about to take place and there were ten guests who took their lit lamps and went out to meet the bridegroom that evening before the wedding banquet. Five of them were foolish and five were wise. The five foolish ones took their lamps but didn’t bring any extra oil with them. However, the five wise ones brought jars of oil to accompany their lit lamps. The bridegroom was taking a long time in coming, and they all became drowsy and eventually fell asleep while waiting upon His arrival.
At the stroke of midnight, one of the guests cried out, “He’s here !!! – The bridegroom is here !!! – Here comes the bridegroom, I can see Him in the distance !!! … Come out to meet Him !!! … Come out to meet the bridegroom !!!
The other 9 sleeping guests woke up at once and trimmed their lamps to draw oil up from the storage reservoir so that their flame would be clean and bright. Understand that a poorly trimmed wick would unfortunately create a dim, useless, and smoky flame.
The foolish ones said to the wise, “Give us some of your oil; our lit lamps are about to go out.”
“No” the wise guests replied, “There may not be enough for both us and you. Instead, go to those who sell the oil and buy some for yourselves.”
But while the unprepared foolish guests were on their way to buy the oil, the bridegroom finally arrived at the venue. The wise guests, who were truly “ready”, ended up entering the wedding banquet alongside Him … AND … as soon as they entered the door was shut.
Later that evening the five foolish guests returned with their newly lit lamps, “Excuse us” they said, “Can you please open the door into the wedding banquet for us ???”
But the Bridegroom replied, “Truly I tell you, I do not know you.”
Lesson Learned …
“Remember to keep watch, for you do not know the “Day” … or … the “Hour” opportunity will Appear”
Now remember that water cooler story I was telling you earlier ??? … Well, while the Optimist, the Pessimist, and the Realist were all arguing about whether the glass of water was half full … or … half empty. I, the “Opportunist”, came by … and … drank it.
… When Need meets Opportunity, will “You” become a victim of circumstance ??? … or … will “You” be truly “Ready” to tip the scales in your favour and take advantage of that moment in time ???
Ps. When it comes to the things that you Really, Really, Really want, Remember to put yourself in a “Position” to Achieve FIRST before actually Achieving … and … “Always” be Prepared for the “Opportunity” that You Seek !!! – You NEVER know how Life may Unfold.
Good Morning Friends !!! – How do you like your eggs cooked ??? – Sunnyside Up ??? … Over Easy ??? … or … Scrambled ??? – Isn’t it great to have the luxury of a Teflon “Non-Stick” pan ??? … That Teflon pan is not only quick and easy to use and clean, it’s light weight and easy to store away as well. However, the “Heaviest” thing a person could ever “Carry” is a prolonged emotionally filled long lasting Grudge. Free Up Your Soul Folks … And … “Forgive”.
Forgiveness doesn’t change the past, but it does allow for a “New” Future. Rip down your rear view mirror and focus your efforts on forging ahead towards becoming a Greater version of yourself.
If you are unable to forgive, how can you ever expect to be forgiven ??? – Be careful that you not judge, for you will be open to being judged as equally, harshly, and accordingly.
It is far better to forgive and forget rather than to hate and remember.
Many a time, the person that you carry this prolonged, grudge – filled, burning torch for is completely oblivious to the fact that they even did anything to offend you in the first place.
Teflon is a tough synthetic resin used to coat “Non-Stick” cookware and utensils so that nothing is able to stick to it while in use. Be like Teflon, withstand ALL criticisms and / or personal attacks with No apparent effects, spare yourself the un-needed inner emotional turmoil, and let “EVERYTHING” just slide right off of You during life’s Heated moments.
The Greatest revenge against any Malicious activity is complete Forgiveness
Ps – Growing up “science – minded”, my decisions and actions were based on empirical evidence and supportive data. However, this was my daily prayer, hope, wish, and want when I was diagnosed with cancer, stuck in a wheelchair, and forced to live in 5 different hospital(s) during 2016 and 2017 because it wasn’t safe for me to be medically unsupervised. – “Dear God, if one day I lose my hope and purpose, give me the confidence that your destiny for me is far better than anything I’ve ever dreamed. Just because something isn’t happening for me right “NOW”, I know it doesn’t mean it will never happen. – Thank You for Giving Me the “Gift” of Life. Please don’t take me yet !!!”
Have a Visual Listen to this conversation between a Parent and one of their Friends – Truly Eye Opening …
Parent : One of my friends asked me – “Why do you pay so much money and spend so much time running around for your children taking them …
1) To band practice
2) To learning how to play a musical instrument
… and / or …
3) To play travel basketball
Aren’t your days and weeks full enough ???”
… Well, I have a confession to make : I don’t pay for my child’s musical lessons / activities or travel basketball … or … instruments, sheets of music, band / basketball camps, basketball uniforms, sport bags, gym shoes, or the many roads trips all spring and summer long.
Friend : So, if You’re not paying for musical lessons / activities … or … travel basketball, what are you paying for?
Parent :
I pay for those moments when my child becomes so tired and frustrated that they feel like quitting … but … Don’t.
I pay for the opportunity that my child will have life – long friendships.
I pay for the chance that my child will have amazing coaches / instructors that will teach them that participating in musical learning is not just about “playing” the instrument and that basketball is not just about “dribbling” a basketball … but … about “Life.”
I pay for my child to learn to be disciplined.
I pay for my child to learn to take care of their mind and their body.
I pay for my child to learn to work with others and to be a proud, supportive, kind and respectful team member.
I pay for my child to learn to deal with disappointment, like when they miss that game winning shot of a Championship Game … or … when they make an unexpected piano playing mistake during competition because the piano chair accidently slipped affecting their performance stripping them of First Place.
I pay for the development of their resiliency, their ability to stand back up again after every time that they fall or fail.
I pay for their self – determination to “become” better and to do their very BEST during each and every practice, performance, and / or game.
I pay for my child to learn how to make, write down, chase after, accomplish, achieve and evaluate goals.
I pay for my child to learn that it takes hours and hours and hours and hours of hard study, dedicated work, mental preparation, and correct specific repetitive practice habits to achieve Greatness and that success does not happen overnight.
I pay so that my child can be in the gym or in a live musical atmosphere instead of inactively sitting in front of a computer / tablet screen, and / or running around the streets with the wrong group of kids.
I could go on but, to be short, I don’t pay for musical lessons / activities or travel basketball; I pay for the “opportunities” that these vehicles provide my child to develop attributes that will serve them well throughout their life and give them the opportunity to bless the lives of others now and in the future. From what I have seen for many, many years, I think it is a Great Investment !!!
… Have you ever thanked your parents / guardians for investing their valuable time and hard earned money IN you ???
… They knew that “Adversity” builds and / or reveals “Character.”
“Character” is the mental and moral qualities distinctive to an individual.
… The “Character” of a person consists of ALL the Qualities that make them unique and distinct from other people.
… Good Trees “Bear” Good Fruit.
… Cheers to Supportive Self Sacrificing Parents & Guardians, Sports, Music, and The “Gift” of Life.
Can You Count on You ??? – You may Be “Labelled” as the Most Influential Person, whether you like it or not, within your Circle of Friends, Teammates, Acquaintances, Family Members, Classmates, and Work Colleagues. They may ALL be “Secretly” watching you, listening to you, and / or seeing what you’re Not saying. If you walk around “Defeated” – If you walk around “Deflated” – So WILL They.
Shine brightly my friend.
… One Person Can Truly Make a Difference = YOU !!!
I was asked this question, while tending bar, on August 3rd 1999 …
… “If you were offered 1 Million Dollars to immediately voluntarily leave society for a completely deserted unpopulated tropical oasis island paradise – would you take the deal ???”
I answered – “NO Way !!!” – “No Chance !!!”
The Rye & Ginger drinking patron asked me Why ??? … My reply was – “What the heck am I going to do on an Island Paradise with NOBODY there. How would I pass time, How would I survive, and Why isn ‘t there an All Inclusive Vacation Resort on this Tropical Island Paradise anyway ??? – Can I get you another Rye & Ginger ???”
Odd question … BUT … still a Good Question.
From that moment on, I would slip this question into as many conversations as I could.
99.9 percent of the people that I have asked this question to have said “NO” or ‘NO WAY” because what good would all that money do with nobody or anything around for them for the of rest of their lives. Believe it or not, social interactions and friendships really DO matter when it comes to having a well rounded fulfilled life.
However, NEVER allow people to care so little about you that they can have a grand “negative” impact on how you feel. Don’t compromise yourself and make concessions to keep these types of people within your Inner Circle of Friends. Liberating yourself from such a crowd, not only teaches you what to avoid in the future, but also positions you in a situation where you can now find the right types of folks, peers, and people that you can truly connect with.
You can’t pay for or buy a true connection. Chemistry is chemistry, and not everyone gets along as easily as they do with others. That’s the reality of life. You’ll be better off working, living, or sharing time with true “stand by you” type friends rather than pounding your head or living with heartache because you’ve chosen to put yourself in socially incompatible situations simply because you don’t want to be alone.
It’s always wise to take inventory of the people in your life. It’s irrelevant if they’re family, friends, boyfriends / girlfriends, acquaintances, or colleagues. If they’re being selfishly unreasonable AND toxic, cut them out of your life IMMEDIATELY !!!
How many of you know someone that BUILDS themselves up by TEARING others down ???
How many of you know someone who is ALWAYS right ???
How many of you know someone who ONLY talks about themselves ???
How many of you know someone who’s a CONSTANT liar ???
How many of you know someone who thinks that they are soooooooooo secretly clever and that others are totally oblivious to their conniving manipulative ways ???
How many of you know someone who always makes you feels guilty or self conscious ???
How many of you know someone who are quick to judge without hearing all the facts first ???
How many of you know someone who NEVER apologizes – even when they’re in the wrong ???
How many of you know someone that punishes others by physically taking themselves away and / or employs the silent treatment towards others when things don’t go their way ???
How many of you know someone who shows no mercy or displays the inability to forgive ???
How many of you know someone who goes out of their way to fool others in order to hide their own personal shortcomings ???
… You don’t know how much time you have on this planet so don’t waste your precious limited moments with people that don’t deserve your company.
Think about someone in your life who leaves an open space for you to be yourself. No one is more valuable. I would rather have a pillar of trust in my life than a pillar of strength — Deepak Chopra
1) Do you have Toxic Friends ??? …
Do you feel drained, agitated, angry, or resentful when you’ve spent time with certain people ???
In unhealthy friendships, one person always seems to give a lot more than the other.
In unhealthy friendships, people ridicule one another, gossip or spread rumors, or act mean to one another.
Unhealthy friendships are threatened when one person grows or changes.
Unhealthy friendships are threatened by other people.
Unhealthy friendships leave you feeling empty and drained
Unhealthy friendships require you to act the way someone else wants you to be in order to be accepted.
Unhealthy friendships only accept certain feelings.
Unhealthy friendships demand conformity
In unhealthy friendships, trusts are broken, secrets are shared, and confidentialities are betrayed.
In unhealthy friendships, only one is committed to the Friendship.
In unhealthy friendships, a toxic friend can’t and won’t share IN your happiness and / or won’t ever celebrate your successes
Unhealthy friendships look to take advantage of another person’s generosity and social standing in order to improve their own.
2) Do you have friends who leave you feeling happy and uplifted ??? …
Healthy friendships are not one-sided. Both people benefit from knowing each other.
Healthy friendships are based on mutual respect.
Healthy friendships allow each other to grow and change.
Healthy friendships are not possessive.
Healthy friendships nourish you and add to your life.
Healthy friendships accept you for who you are.
Healthy friendships allow you to have your feelings.
Healthy friendships respect differences.
Healthy friendships are safe and secure.
In healthy friendships, both people are committed to the friendship.
Healthy friendships are not about power or status.
***********************************
Protect yourself from Toxic People, Toxic Friendships, and Toxic Relationships. At ALL costs AVOID …
The Blamer – someone who blames you and others for everything that is wrong in their life, thereby forever avoiding responsibility
The Complainer – Nothing seems to work in their life, yet does nothing to change it. They get their energy from dumping their frustrations on you.
The Drainer – Feels so needy that the conversation always revolves around them and never shows any interest in you.
The Shamer – May reprimand or belittle you and your ideas in front of others while convincing you their actions are for your / the group’s own good
The Discounter – Someone who has a strong need to be “Right” and challenges every word that you say to the point of exhaustion … For You
The Gossiper – Gets energy by creating a “Buzz” about others thereby offering no safety in the friendship
F.R.I.E.N.D.S …
F = Fight for You
R = Respect You
I = Include You
E = Encourage You
N = Need You
D = Deserve You
S = Stand By You
YOU Deserve The Very BEST !!!. Stay away from Liars, Fake Friends, and People who Bring You Down. Surround Yourself with People Who Truly Care for you, your successes, and your well being. Fewer that are “True” are BETTER than Alot of “Fairweather” Acquaintances.
Liars know how to turn things around and make it seem like it’s always your fault. Stay Away from Negative People They seem to HAVE a Problem For Every Solution.
Fairweather Friends
Stop giving Your Precious “TIME” to the wrong People. Life is too short to spend time with people who suck the happiness right out of you. If someone wants you in their life, they’ll make room for you. You shouldn’t have to fight for a spot. Never ever insist yourself to someone who continuously overlooks your worth. Remember, it’s not the people that stand by your side when you’re at your best, it’s the ones who stand by your side when you’re at your worst that are your True Friends.
Some people will only ‘Love You” as much as they can use you … And … their loyalty ends where the benefits stop.
You see a person’s true colours when you are no longer beneficial to their life.
I hate how some people will smile in your face, lie to you, try to use you THEN get mad when you get smart and stop letting them.
… Think of your friends and the people that you know. Then go through the list above and Count the number of times you would put “Healthy” next to their names.
… Take a look at your role as a friend. In what ways are you a healthy friend ??? – In what ways are you an unhealthy friend ???
Before we say bye for a while, I urge every single one of you to look not Only on your own interests BUT also on the interests of others … And … never entangle yourselves within the snare of an angry wrathful human being. Bad company corrupts good character and ruins morals.
The Best THREE Things that a Person could ever lose in Life are Negative Stress, Unhealthy Fair-Weather Friendships … and … Belly Weight = Happy New Years “2019” Everybody !!!
Ps. Let me leave you with this quote from Commander Ulysses S. Grant – the 18th President of The United States of America …
“The friend in my adversity I shall always cherish most. I can better trust those who helped to relieve the gloom of my dark hours than those who are so ready to enjoy with me the sunshine of my prosperity”
“A man went on a journey for an undetermined amount of time but before leaving he called Together his servants and entrusted to them his property. To one the Master gave five talents, to another the Master gave two, to the third the Master gave one all according to their ability and then he went away. The one who had received the five talents went at once and traded with them, and made five talents more. The servant who had the two talents successfully generated two more talents as well. But the servant who had received the one talent went and dug it into the ground and hid his master’s money. Now after a long time, the Master of those servants came home and settled accounts with them. The servant who had received the five talents came forward, bringing five talents more, saying, “Master, you delivered to me five talents; here, I have made five talents more. The Master replied “Well done, good and faithful servant. You have been faithful over a little; I will set you over much. Enter into the joy of your master.” The servant who had the two talents came forward, saying, “Master, you delivered to me two talents; here, I have made two talents more.” His master approvingly said “Well done, good and faithful servant. You have been faithful over a little; I will set you over much. Enter into the joy of your master.” The servant who had received the one talent came forward, saying, “Master, I knew you to be a hard man, reaping where you did not sow, and gathering where you scattered no seeds, so I was afraid, and I went and hid your talent in the ground. Here, you have what is yours.” But the master answered the 3 rd servant saying “You wicked, reluctant, lazy servant !!! You knew that I reap where I have not sown and gathered where I have not scattered seeds. You should have invested my money with the bankers, and at my coming I should have received what was my own “with” interest.” So the Master took the talent away from the unambitious servant and gave it to the one who successfully created the ten talents. To everyone who HAS, more will be given, and they will have an abundance … BUT … For the one who HAS not, even what they have will be eventually taken or wasted away.
… Many a talented person have gone un-noticed
What are your contributions into this planet ???
What are your actions ???
What are you giving back into this World that we live in ???
Many people will leave this planet without a trace
Will anybody know that you came this way ???
What global fingerprint will you leave behind after your time on Earth is done ???
What will be different because you were here ???
Most people won’t even take the time to invest into themselves because they’re too busy being busy
Refuse to settle for Less than your greatest Global contribution – You know what you’re great at
Monitor your inner conversations
If you think you can … or … you think you can’t – You’re Right
Live …
… energetically
… inclusively
… passionately
… lively
… positively
… happily
… purposely
… and …
… selflessly
Why do you want What is it that you Want ???
Visualize yourself succeeding, Begin with the End in mind
Reverse engineer your “Specific” plans by working backwards to where you are now and then catapult your quest towards to it’s noble bullseye
Empower a Cause greater than yourself
… And …
Fight like it’s impossible to lose
Make it a mission that relentlessly drives you.
People will want to be around your exciting enthusiasm and charismatic contagious conviction
Life is a gift to ALL of us
How we live our lives is a gift to the One that gave us life in the first place
What kind of gift(s) are you manifesting ???
Don’t wait for all things to line up perfectly, there will always be a reason NOT to try
People tend to live by the principle – “If I can see it, then I’ll do it … or … “If I can see it, then I’ll believe it”
Extraordinary people tend to live by Faith and Not by Sight.
Extra Ordinary Faithful Human Beings tend to live by the principle – “If I believe it, I CAN see it !!!” … AND … won’t be thrown off by others that don’t have the exact same vision
Which one are you today ???
Which one will you strive to become tomorrow ???
C’mon, Take that faithful leap
We’re ONLY on this Planet Once
Share your common shortcomings
Share your surmountable struggles
Share your relatable sufferings
… And …
Educate and Inspire your Global Brothers and Sisters to Keep their Chins Up and Continue Pressing Forward while remaining Forever Hopeful
Ps. – A Candle Looses “Nothing” When It Lights Another – (By, Lewis Mitz)
Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, and Happy New Years 2019 !!! … Greatness Awaits You – Know That I’m Cheering On. Make It Happen … and … Please keep me posted
Allow your deep rooted faith, in HOPE, to calm your agitated emotions, ill – thoughts, and fears in order to ride out the stormy waters of the days that surround you.
Joseph Panek (2010), wrote an artistic article painting a beautiful picture of The “Lighthouse” as its’ main subject …
A Lighthouse is a tall circular stone structure erected upon the highest point of land that is closest to the sea and its potential dangers. It notifies sailors that land is near and warns them that they are approaching rocks, reefs and shallow waters which must be navigated with caution.
The Lighthouse stands alone and tall in both light and darkness, acting as a saviour to the lost, as a focal point which symbolizes strength, guidance and safe harbour; it is a Spiritual “Welcome Mat” for all those who are travelling by sea.
Metaphorically, as the element of Water represents human emotion(s), the Lighthouse is a symbol for spiritual strength and emotional guidance which is available to ALL of us during the times we feel we are being helplessly tossed around in a sea of inner turmoil.
With these thoughts in mind, let us now explore the metaphors which are related to, and are associated with, the symbol of the Lighthouse.
Storms consist of both wind (air) and rain (water). Air is the element representing the mind, water is the element representing the emotions, and the storms symbolize our distressed thoughts, worries, and fears. Metaphorically, the storms are our inner demons which torment both our mind and our soul filled spirit.
The rocks, reefs, and the shallow waters symbolize the final dangers and miseries which seem to accompany the end of any turbulent voyage. Just as the saying goes, “its always darkest before the dawn”, things always seem the most dangerous and hopeless as we reach the end of an emotional turmoil. This is the point when we feel like tossing up our hands and giving up. However, it is just after this point that our problems tend to end up being solved.
The strength of the Lighthouse is symbolized by its location. It is erected at the highest point of land which is closest to the sea and its dangers. Its circular construction makes it impervious to the most bitter gales which time and nature can hurl at it. As the circle is a symbol of divinity, the circular structure of the Lighthouse symbolizes both stable and reliable spiritual guidance during our mental and emotional storms.
The beacon is the guiding light, the illuminated eye, which shines in ALL directions enabling ALL who are adrift at sea to use it as a focal point in order to steer towards the calm waters of the safe harbour which the Lighthouse oversees.
The symbol of the Lighthouse reminds us that, regardless of how turbulent our emotional seas may become, we need only focus on its’ guiding light and let it lead us closer and closer to the point that we are now closer to the Lighthouse than we were to the darkness and the danger. Avoiding the opposite and the reverse of “Lived” is most definitely the goal.
Once we are safe within our “Harbour of Tranquility” we are better able to evaluate the emotional tides and currents which are temporarily disturbing our voyage. Once our emotional storm finally passes, we can once again set out to sea and enjoy heavenly skies, calm seas, and the prosperous baptizing waters as we cheerfully sail away from dangerous destinations and move towards new horizons, new lands, new kingdoms, and new worldly adventures.
During a period of testing and trial, pain and sorrow, darkness and uncertainty, such a time may be filled with nothing but restlessness, emptiness, hopelessness, trembling of faith, lack of direction, and an absence of a guiding light. However, remember that this given “Miracle of Life” has plans for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
But yes, in the midst of the darkness, hardships, and an immensely difficult time; our human hearts may be troubled and our faith may be on the verge of giving up BUT we must Always remember the storm tossed ships at sea and their crews that are patiently being guided to safety via the illuminating and steadfast Lighthouse.
When in Darkness, The “Light” Shines Brightest … and … when You seek the Light You’ll find the Light especially when you Faithfully seek it with ALL your Heart and every Fibre of your Being, for if you are adrift you know that it will lead you to safety and salvation. In life, and on the waters, keep your eyes glued on the sacred “Lighthouse” it will provide the way, the light, and the most truest route out of the dangerous darkness – We ALL need a “Symbolic” Lighthouse in our lives to help us out of dark times. Cheers to The “Lighthouse” – High Praise To The “Lighthouse” 😉
One Positive Person Walks Into a Room Filled with Four Negative People, What Ends Up Happening ??? … “Five” Negative People End Up Walking Out, That’s Right “Five” Negative People !!! … How Many of You Have Ever Experienced This ??? … How Many of You Have Ever Gone Into a Facility, or Gone into a Room, or Gone into an Environment Feeling “Great” … But … Being Surrounded with All This Negative Energy Made You End Up Leaving Feeling Terrible ??? … I Know That There’s at Least One or Two of You Out There that Can Understand and Relate to What I’m Talking About. Today’s topic is “Protecting Your Attitude !!!”
Here are Four Ideas That You can Implement Immediately :
1) To Counter Punch the Physical and Emotional “Roughness” of Your Day, Read 15 Minutes Daily from a Positive Mental Attitude Book, or Read from a Book that can Provide You with New Information, New Tools, and New Knowledge that You Can Apply Along Your Journey Towards Achievement. I Know, I Know, I Know … You’re Going to Say that You Hate Reading and that You Choose NOT to Read Because The Source’s Information is JUST Someone Else’s “Opinion.” If That’s How You Really Feel, Then Stop Reading HERE.Truth Is, YOU Don’t Know What You Don’t Know, So Refuse to Seek Bliss by Choosing to Remain Unknowing and Commit To Reading 15 Minutes Daily From a Positive Mental Attitude Book !!!
2) Let’s Say You’re Not a Big Reader, I Totally Get It, Let’s Say That You Would Rather Watch or Listen to Your Information. If so, Plug Into An Appropriate Audio Book, or An Audio Podcast, or Watch a DVD that can Provide You with Information that Will Help Uplift and Esteem You, Make You Feel Worthy of Success, and / or Get You Closer to Whatever it is that You’re Looking to Achieve. Commit to 15 Minutes daily and let’s Erase Stinkin’ Thinkin’ from Your Brain.
3) Surround Yourself with People that Truly Want to See You Win … and … Free Yourself from Those Who Only Know How to Criticize, Complain, and Condemn. Only Time Will Reveal Who will be Right and Who will be Wrong.Until then, Stay Away from Those Who Use the Words No, Don’t, Won’t and Can’t Towards You. You Never Know, Whatever It Is That You’re Trying to Achieve Might be the One Thing that Will Help Others Believe that They Too Can Succeed.After All, If You Can Show that it’s “Achievable” it may Inspire Others to Try, Commit, Plan, and Do.
4) Take Ownership of your Shortcomings … And … Refuse to Blame Others for Your Failures. Your Attitude is 100 % Controllable by You … And … Always Remember, It’s Not What Happens to You that Matters – It’s How You Handle it that Does
The Best Teachers are Those Who Show You Where to Look … But … Don’t Tell You What to See.
Mr HP, one of my Professional & Personal Mentors, Coach, and Friend, who had a long line up of People Waiting Patiently to get Time in His Calendar back Home, battled cancer Valiantly but eventually lost in the year 2011 leaving behind his Loving Wife, 3 Wonderful Young Children, and a Huge Community that Mourned His Loss.
I was Gratefully Blessed to have crossed paths with This Man via my Cousin’s Husband … It was November 14, 1994 … and … this was the Very First Lesson that Mr. HP Ever Taught Me. I was young, I was ambitious, I had no filter, and I’ll never forget it !!! … It was Mainly because of how “Stupidly” I replied …
This was Me :
… “You Drove 6 hours All The Way From Montreal to Tell Me This, That’s It, That’s All I’m Going to get Today ???”
… Remember, E’mail, The Internet, Skype, FaceTime, and Cell Phone Texting Didn’t Exist Yet.
He laughed and said “Let it Marinate for a Bit, Soak it Up. I’m going to grab a coffee would you like one ???” He left to get the coffees leaving me sitting at the table pondering to Myself, “Let it Marinate for a Bit ??? … Soak it Up ???” … So that’s what I did before he returned to the table with the coffees. For the remainder of my appointment we talked about His Beloved Montreal Canadians and My Over Achieving Toronto Maple Leafs.
It’s May “2018” now, 24 years later, and I’m Still Marinating In It !!! … and … I’m Still Soaking it Up !!!
Here’s How My First Coaching Session Went with Mr. HP “24 years” ago on November 14, 1994 in the Coffee Time at Markham Road and Progress Ave …
From here on out, This is All Mr. HP Speaking …
“I’m Asking You to Reflect and Look Inward Today :
Is it “Love” Things, “Use” People ???
… Or …
Is it “Use” Things, “Love” People ???”
… Let it Marinate For a Bit.
… Soak It Up.”
This Very First Lesson was “The Drip” that Started and Created All of Today’s Present Day Rippling.
… Who Invested Their Time in Me … And … Because of Their Forever Available Ear and Guidance I felt Compelled to Write Them a Letter. That’s right a letter, you see there was Still no E’mail, no Internet, no Skype, no FaceTime, and no Texting Cell Phones yet in 1988. I wrote a letter to Mrs. EF in the second semester of my first year of University which was in 1988 … and … I wrote another to Mr. ER in 2006 Letting Them Know What Became of Me … And … Thanking Them for Believing In Me. Sad News is, My Letters Couldn’t be Mailed … Why ???, You Ask … When I Inquired as to How I could get these Letters Delivered to them Both … I was Shockingly Told that Each of Them Had Passed Away.
I don’t have Many Regrets, but I now Know what Regret does Feel like.
… A Teacher Affects Eternity; It’s a Shame how Some of Them will Never Know just how Far their Influence Affected Another.
A Small Few of Us have been Lucky Enough to have had that Special Someone who Refused to See Us for Where we Were At … But … Chose to See Us For What We Could Become.
Whoever that may be for You, Please Take a Few Minutes out of Your Overbooked Busy Day and Send Them a quick “Hello and a Thank You” while you still can. It’s “2018” and E’mail, The Internet, Skype, FaceTime and Texting Cell Phones are just a reach away 😉
Before We Say Bye for a While … What’s it going to be ??? … How are YOU going to Arrange these “Four” simple Words ??? …
Is it going to be …
“Love Things, Use People”
Or
Is it going to be …
“Use Things, Love People”
… Marinate in it for a Bit.
… Soak It Up.
… And …
… Send Me a Text, “24 Years” from Now 😉
… Thank You for Your Time
RIP :
1) Mrs. EF – 1988
2) Mr. ER – 2006
3) Mr. HP – 2011
… “Thank You For Believing In Me, I Won’t Let You Down”
… It’s Always Fascinating to See How Life Unfolds.
Here’s a Post Written by My Friend, Jay Zelle, It Will Massage Your Heart and Fuel Your Soul.
Soooooooo Grab Your Favourite Drink … and … Enjoy :
Jay Zelle’s Lyric Space
A True Story, Too Good to be A True Story
One night, two colleagues, Anne Marie and Nadia, were out with a group of coworkers to bid farewell to another coworker who was moving on to another adventure in their field. Little did they know that the universe conspired to spark a connection between them that went far beyond their reason for being out that night. The two colleagues, so they thought, were merely guests at the party until the celebration came close to its end.
As if by chance, a good friend of the celebrant was dining at the same restaurant and she was introduced to Anne Marie and the group. When Anne Marie heard the friend’s last name, she asked if the friend’s mother had been a teacher because Anne Marie’s grade two teacher shared the same last name. This sparked a conversation between Anne Marie and Nadia that would turn magical.
Nadia shared that she too had a grade two teacher by the same name. Anne Marie thought this was impossible given that she and Nadia were the same age but attended different elementary schools. It didn’t make sense until Nadia shared that she attended Anne Marie’s school in grade one and grade two. Neither had any recollection of the other until after they separated from the restaurant that night.
A flood of memories took over Nadia and consumed her heart. She quickly connected with another colleague to get Anne Marie’s number so that they could speak. Nadia began to ask more questions via text, naming classmates that they would have had in common. Anne Marie, while able to confirm the identities of these people, could not remember Nadia and regretfully admitted this to her. Nadia told Anne Marie flat out, “I remember you! You were friends with a girl who was being mean to me and you left her to play with me. You saved me. We have to sit down and talk about this.”
Anne Marie was determined to figure this out. She even asked her husband (who also attended the same school) if he remembered Nadia, but he too could not recall. She went to social media to seek out her grade two class photo and then she saw the grade two version of Nadia and her memory sparked. She remembered the quiet, shy young girl that she played with as a child.
Anne Marie shared the picture with Nadia and exchanged messages until Nadia felt compelled to speak with Anne Marie on the phone. They would engage in a conversation that would demonstrate the power of love and the value of simple kindness.
Nadia shared with Anne Marie that long after they were no longer classmates in her teenage years, she was going through difficult times. In this heart-wrenching time, Nadia wrote three separate letters of gratitude to remind herself of the love that surrounded her. Two letters were for each of her parents and one was addressed to a grade one girl named Anne Marie who showed her kindness and love at a time in her life when Nadia felt bullied and hopeless. Upon hearing this, Anne Marie felt shattered for her friend, but blessed to have been part of her story. The greatest blessing was that Nadia had come out of that time in her life to become one who radiates kindness, love, joy and light.
Ironically, Nadia had vowed that one day she would find Anne Marie to thank her. And she did so on that fateful night. Unbeknownst to the two of them, Love had already opened that door years ago when they started working together, allowing their friendship to rekindle from when they were children
No Human Being is an Island. We All Need People in Our Lives Who Raise Our Standards, Remind Us of Our Essential Purpose & Brilliance, Care About Our Successes, Help Us Dust Off Our Defeats, and Challenge Us To Become the Greatest Version of Ourselves …
We Only “Get” One Chance at Life, This ‘Ain’t No Dress Rehearsal.
It Scares Me to Know that I Have a Friend / Colleague who Recently Battled Cancer, Was Labelled Cancer Free, Did EVERYTHING “Right”, Traditionally and Holistically, to Stay in Remission only to Find Out a Few Days ago that the Cancer has Returned and that Their Treatment Had to Re-Start Immediately. It Breaks My Heart to Know This … and … it Terrifies Me At The Same Time. Whenever I See or Hear the Word “Time”, I Can’t Help But Sigh. “Time” – What a Great “Gift” It Truley Is … I’m Hoping, Praying, Wishing, and Fighting … For “EXTRA”
Thank You All For Your Kind and Encouraging Words, Texts, Prayers, E’mails, and Visits. Know That I Battle This Cancer Everyday with the Mindset of Eventually Annihilating It … And … I Can’t Wait To Meet the Version of Myself at the Other End of All This. Thank You ALL, Near and Far, For Cheering Me On – July 2018 is a Big Medical Month for Me, My Fingers are Crossed … And … I’m Sending Hugs and High Fives to You ALL !!!
“Time”, what a Great Gift !!! Once “Time” is Gone, It’s GONE and You Can Never Get Those Precious Hours, Minutes, and Seconds Back – Agree ???
Please Sit Down For The Next Few Minutes and “HEAR” the Remaining Words that are on This Page.
At the End of This Story, Ask Yourself – “What’s Currently In MY Jar ???”
You Can Choose To Stop Reading Here and Proceed Onward Towards your next Destination and Your Day will Unfold as Scheduled. After All, Ignorance Can Be Bliss.
However, If You Continue To Proceed Down This Rabbit Hole Your Life’s Paradigms, Thoughts, and Beliefs Could Be Changed Forever. Shall we Continue ???
Ok, Here We Go …
… Once Upon A Time, A Professor Stood Before Their Philosophy Class and They had some Items in Front of Them. When the Class Began, Wordlessly, The Professor Picked Up A Very Large Empty Mayonnaise Jar and Proceeded to Fill It with Large Rocks. The Professor then Asked their Students if the Jar was Full. The Students Agreed That It Was.
The Professor then Picked up a Box of Pebbles and Poured Them Into the Jar and Shook the Jar Lightly Causing The Pebbles to Roll Into the Open Areas Between the Large Rocks. The Professor then Asked their Students Once Again if the Jar Was Full. The Students Agreed That It Was.
The Professor then Picked Up A Box of Sand and Poured It Into the Jar and, Of Course, the Sand Filled Up Everything Else. The Professor then Asked Their Students Once More if the Jar was Full. The Students Responded with a Unanimous “YES !!!”
The Professor then Sneakily Produced 2 Cups Of Coffee from Underneath the Table and Poured the Entire Contents into the Jar As Well, Effectively Filling the Remaining Empty Space Between the Sand. The Students Loudly Laughed.
“Now,” said the Professor, as the Laughter Subsided, “I Want You To Recognize That This Jar Represents Your Life.
“The Large Rocks are the Important Things — Your God, Your Health, Your Family, Your Children, Your Friends, and Your Favourite Passions — Things That If Everything Else Was Lost and Only They Remained, Your Life Would Still Be Full.”
“The Pebbles are the Other Things that Matter like Your Job, Your House, and Your Car.”
“The Sand Is Everything Else — The Small Stuff.”
“If You Put The Sand Into the Jar First,” The Professor continued, “There Will Be No Room for The Pebbles or The Large Rocks.”
“The Same Goes For Life. If You Spend All of Your Time and Energy on The Small Stuff, You Will Never Have Room for the Things That Are Truly Important to You.”
“Pay Attention to the Things that are Critical to Your Happiness.”
“ALWAYS Take Care of Your Health FIRST !!! If You Don’t Have Your Health, What Have You Really Got ???” …
“Play with Your Children Before They Are No Longer Children” …
“Take Time to Get Medical Checkups. I’ll Write Again, If You Don’t Have Your Health, What Have You Really Got ???” …
“Take your Spouse / Partner out on a Date” …
“Continue To Do Your Enjoyable Recreational Activities” …
“Share Quality Time with Your Family. Create Memories. Talk with Them, Not at Them” …
“There Will Always Be Time to “Clean the House” and “Fix the Disposal”
“Take Care of the Large Rocks First — The Things That Really Matter. Set Your Priorities. The Rest Is Just Sand.”
… Once “Time” is Gone, It’s GONE and You Can Never Get Those Precious Hours, Minutes, and Seconds Back. The Choice is Yours – Choose Wisely !!!
Ps – One of the Students Raised Their Hand and Inquired About What The 2 Cups Of Coffee Were Meant To Mean.
The Professor Smiled. “I’m Glad You Asked. It Just Goes To Show You That No Matter How Full Your Life May Seem, There’s Always Room For 2 Cups Of Coffee With A Friend.”
*** When Things In Your Life Seem Almost Too Much To Handle, and the 24 Hours in a Day Don’t Seem to be Enough, Remember The “Empty Mayonnaise Jar and The 2 Cups of Coffee” ***
Before We Say Bye for a While … I Beg You To Remain Seated In Your Chair Until You Have Honestly Answered This Important Question … What’s Currently In Your Jar ???
… Please Claim Your “Free Gift” of “Appreciation” via the link below :
“As Little as 15 Minutes of Exercise Per Day can Ward Off the Negative Impact of Remaining Sedentary”
By Olivia Glauberzon
Sitting at your desk for eight to 10 hours a day may be a necessary part of running a financial advisory practice, but all that inactivity can increase your risk of obesity, hypertension and heart attack.
As little as 15 minutes of exercise per day can ward off the negative impact of remaining sedentary, fitness experts say. In fact, you can even get in a workout without leaving your desk. Here are some suggestions to help you keep fit if you can’t leave the office:
Stretch Your Limbs. Sitting at a desk all day can cause your body to become tense, especially when you find yourself hunched over in intense concentration for hours.
Taking as little as five minutes a day to stretch your limbs can improve your mood, says Nelson Beltijar, a personal trainer and private consultant with Toronto-based VillaBelt Consulting Services.“Stretching can increase your range of motion and body temperature,” he says, “which triggers [the release of] endorphins and makes you happier.”
You can do the following stretches at your desk to improve your blood circulation.
Start with neck circles. Tilt your chin down toward your chest, then move it across your chest, toward the left shoulder, back to a neutral position, then to the right shoulder and back.
Next, loosen your shoulders by scrunching them up toward your ears, then move them downward.
Stretch your back by interlocking your hands in front of your chest and pushing outward with your palms out. Hold at the maximum stretch for about 10 seconds.
Stretch your back and legs by placing your feet straight out in front of your chair and leaning forward to grab your toes.
These stretches break up the monotony of constantly sitting in the same position, Beltijar says, adding: “Stretching is crucial to combating back pain you might get from sitting the same way for prolonged periods.”
Pump Up Your Muscles. If you have privacy around your desk, try some dynamic exercises in your cubicle to build muscle, suggests Jason Fisher, owner of Toronto-based Kickstart Fitness: “The more muscle you can build, the more calories you burn when you are sedentary.”
Fisher recommends starting with simple desk squats. Stand up from your chair and then sit back down repeatedly and without using a counter surface for support. Be sure to keep your abdominal muscles engaged and your shoulders pinned back as you rise and fall. It takes about 10 to 15 repetitions, he adds, to get the benefit.
You can also strengthen your legs as you sit in your chair by kicking one leg out and holding it parallel to the floor for about two seconds before lowering it back down. “By keeping your leg suspended,” Beltijar says, “you strengthen your thighs and abdominals.” Do about 10 reps on one leg before moving to the other.
You can finish your active routine with some desk pushups, says Fisher. Place your arms on the flat surface of your work area about shoulder-width apart. Stand back far enough that when you stand on your toes and lower your chest toward the desk, your back is straight and you can feel the tension across the widest part of your chest. Adds Fisher: “Be sure to keep your back straight.”
Buy A Trekdesk. The Trek-Desk treadmill desk (US$479; www.trekdesk.com) allows you to combine your work area and treadmill into one unit. The TrekDesk itself is a desk attachment that fits over your treadmill so you can walk while you work.
The average North American is about half as active as he or she should be, says Steve Bordley, founder of Phoenix-based TrekDesk. “We need to walk at least 5,000 steps a day,” he says, “and the average North American walks about 2,000 steps.”
The TrekDesk features a manuscript holder, a cup holder and pen holders, as well as a flat work surface. “We don’t recommend you stay on for a set time,” Bordley adds, “but you can walk for up to eight hours a day if you want.”
*** Always Consult with Your Doctor “Before” Participating in Any Weight Loss and/or Exercise Program ***
Original Interview by Olivia Glauberzon from The Investment Executive. See link below :
Sasha Fisher has had the privilege to be able to follow her dreams and work in a creative industry that she is super passionate about as a creator of documentary films. Freelancing in the independent film world is something that she would not advise anyone who values structure in their work life and / or a secure feeling of long-term financial stability, especially not in the beginning. A couple years after graduating from The RTA School of Media from Ryerson University in Toronto, Canada, she was finally able to quit her bar job so she could spend all of her time on any film set that would have her. Sasha would often volunteer to work 14 hour days – and sometimes overnight – where she would hustle harder than ever had before in order to lock the next job and the next and then the next. It was also around that same time when she was clinically diagnosed with depression and had to learn how to navigate a mind that felt completely foreign to her.
Sasha Fisher is an award-winning producer from Toronto, Canada. Her passion and fierce commitment to producing non-fiction content transpires in her work, resulting in innovative and stunning films. She spotlights her talents by writing, directing and producing documentaries in the areas of social justice and human rights. Sasha produced the short documentary “Take A Walk on the Wildside” which won the 2018 Canadian Screen Award … and … was eligible to apply to the Academy Awards
When Sasha is isn’t behind or in front of the camera, editing, writing, and / or producing her next masterpiece she could found enjoying vegetarian food, swimming, dancing, singing, and spending lots of quality time with her cat, Maya Angelou
Sasha Fisher …
Please List TWO “Business or Life Lessons” – (Or One of Each) – That You Have Learned Along The Way That Has Significantly Contributed To Your Personal and / or Professional Development and Success ???
Life Lesson …
I learned a tough lesson about the importance of “Self-Care” in order to achieve success in other aspects of life, not the other way around. Since then, I have been medicated for many years and I find so much value in therapy, but there’s so much more work that needs to be done for me to feel like myself. What I eat has a huge impact on how I feel: eating garbage food makes me feel like garbage. I can clearly feel the difference not only physically but more importantly mentally when I exercise and meditate each week. I make sure to spend 5-10 minutes every night journaling which helps me work through some of those thoughts that I haven’t been quite able to articulate.
I budget for the things that make me happy, which is hard to do when money is tight, but it’s a big one, giving me something to look forward to and a memory that I can cherish. I am always trying to strengthen my relationship with myself forgiving myself for the stupid mistakes I make constantly and finding peace with who I am in body and soul. I need to make time to see my friends and family even when my work schedule is demanding.
Business Lesson …
One of the most important lessons that I have ever learned is that ONLY you can do the work that it takes to get you to where you feel like YOU. “Destroy the idea that you have to be constantly working or grinding to be successful and embrace the concept of rest, recovery and reflection as essential parts of the progress towards a successful and ultimately happy life.” – I read The Artidote years ago, early on in my career, and I remember seeing a job posting to work in a position that I really wanted. The posting listed that they were looking to hire a team of people and specified the date and location of the interviews but when I applied I was not asked to come back in for an interview. In most cases, this would be the end of the potential prospect with that particular job but I wasn’t willing to take “no” for an answer. I got up, dressed up and showed up to those interviews and hoped they didn’t have a list of names that I was not on. I was told to wait with a group of people who were talking about where they were when they got the call to come in for an interview and I kept telling myself just smile and nod. They led us to a room and talked about what the job entailed and at the end they announced that anyone could volunteer by raising their hand to decide the order of who gets interviewed. My hand shot up right away and I was the first one picked. I knew I had the job by the time I walked out of the building. Not only did I get the job, but I was one of the only people who were asked to stay on after the initial contract expired. None of that would have been possible had I not shown a level of confidence beyond how I felt about myself. Looking back after working in the industry for 7 years I no longer have to apply for jobs and I have worked my way up to having the luxury of choosing projects that I feel passionately about. Gather the confidence you wish you had and pretty soon you won’t be faking it anymore.
Can I share a quick story with you all ??? … Thank You For Your Time,
1) While I was Living in 4 Different Hospitals for 9 consecutive months for Cancer Related Treatments & Surgeries in 2016 and 2017
2) While I was Stuck in Bed Staring at the Ceiling for the next 4 consecutive months because of Post Surgery Wound Healing in 2017
3) While I was Living in another Hospital in late 2017 for another 2 consecutive months Stuck in Bed Staring at the Ceiling once again due to a Discovered Fractured L4 Vertebrae … and … also because of a Spinal Infection that was Eating Away at my L3, L4, L5 Vertebraes as well
During This Time Window My Retired Mom gave me 90 % of her “Time” waking up at 6 am Daily and leaving the house by 7:30 am, along with my Sister, dealing with Toronto Rush Hour Traffic that Turned a normally 30 minute drive into an 1 hour and 30 minute ride arriving in My Hospital Room by 9 or 9:30 am to Make Sure that She was Present for when ALL of My Doctors came to Visit / Check In on Me. She also stayed with me until 7 pm while I rested, ate, slept, had my daily Chemotherapy Treatments, and when I was Hospitalized Post Surgery … Not to Mention … While I was Living in Their Home when I wasn’t in the Hospital.
… I have Friends who are Mothers and Every Time They came to Visit Me they Demanded My Mom to Leave my Hospital Room to go for a Walk or to Take a Nap in the Hospital Floor’s Lounge … Non – Negotiable. As soon as my Mom left the room I would be Reminded by the Visiting Ladies about the Undying Strength of a Mother’s Love and What a Mother would Go through for the Health and Safety of Her Child. As Emotionally & Physically Exhausted as she was, my Mom showed up almost EVERYDAY to make sure that I wasn’t alone. When she couldn’t make it in, Family Members came in to Bridge the Gap.
There was a Time when I was so Extremely Weak, I couldn’t even lift my head off of the Hospital Pillow, and All I could do to communicate was Open My Left Eye. I couldn’t even speak, read, write, or text, I was that Weak and Incoherent. It was around this Time that I asked my Mom to “Promise Me” that If I should Pass Away that I wouldn’t be Alone if that Happened. We All Knew that my Mom wanted to stay with me All Day and All Night but we also knew that would be way too taxing on her and her health. It was then that my Mom frantically searched for Friends and Family who could stay with Me overnight. She Found the Special Few that gave us their evenings and early mornings to help put Hers and My Mind at Peace when she had to leave the Hospital for Home. By the Grace of God “WE” All Made It Through that Dark Time.
I’ll Take Continued Follow Ups with My Cancer Drs to see where I’m at and what’s next for Me any day of week
Lying in the Hospital Bed all those Months made me Realize that I have Never REALLY expressed my Love towards My Mom beyond a Huge Hug and “Saying” an I Love You
Now that I Still “Get” To be Here, I’m Not going to let this Chance Slip Away
These “Words” are for You Mom …
It takes a lot to know what is love
It’s not the big things, but the little things
That can mean enough
A lot of prayers to get me through
And there is never a day that passes by
I don’t think of you
You were always there for me
Pushing me
And guiding me
Always to succeed
You showed me
When I was young just how to grow
You showed me
Everything that I should know
You showed me
Just how to walk without your hands
‘Cause mom you always were
The Perfect Fan
God has been so good
Blessing me with a family
Who did all they could
And I’ve had many years of grace
And it flatters me
When I see
A smile on your face
I want to thank you for what you’ve done
In hopes I can give back to you
And Be the Perfect Son
You showed me how to love
You showed me how to care
You showed me that you would
Always be there
I want to thank you for that time
And I’m proud to say you’re mine
You showed me
When I was young just how to grow
You showed me
Everything that I should know
You showed me
Just how to walk without your hands
‘Cause mom you always were
The Perfect Fan
‘Cause mom you always were
Mom you always were
Mom you always were
You know you always were
‘Cause mom you always were,
The Perfect Fan
I Love You Mom 💕
Although I “Stole” These Lyrics from a Certain Song, I MEAN EVERY SINGLE WORD in the Text that I’ve Written Above
… I Love You Dearly Mom !!!
… Once Again, Thank You For Everything
… I’m soooooo Happy and Grateful to be Given “Time” to Celebrate and Say Happy Mothers Day To You This “2018” ❤
Your Loving Son,
Nelson Beltijar
Ps – These Words, These Lyrics, This Song Above are Reserved for Only “Two” more Occasions in my Life … Hope You Enjoyed Them
