I was asked this question, while tending bar, on August 3rd 1999 …

… “If you were offered 1 Million Dollars to immediately voluntarily leave society for a completely deserted unpopulated tropical oasis island paradise – would you take the deal ???”

I answered – “NO Way !!!”  –  “No Chance !!!” 

The Rye & Ginger drinking patron asked me Why ??? … My reply was  –  “What the heck am I going to do on an Island Paradise with NOBODY there.  How would I pass time, How would I survive, and Why isn ‘t there an All Inclusive Vacation Resort on this Tropical Island Paradise anyway ??? – Can I get you another Rye & Ginger ???”

Odd question … BUT … still a Good Question.

From that moment on, I would slip this question into as many conversations as I could.

99.9 percent of the people that I have asked this question to have said “NO” or ‘NO WAY” because what good would all that money do with nobody or anything around for them for the of rest of their lives.  Believe it or not, social interactions and friendships really DO matter when it comes to having a well rounded fulfilled life.

However, NEVER allow people to care so little about you that they can have a grand “negative” impact on how you feel.  Don’t compromise yourself and make concessions to keep these types of people within your Inner Circle of Friends. Liberating yourself from such a crowd, not only teaches you what to avoid in the future, but also positions you in a situation where you can now find the right types of folks, peers, and people that you can truly connect with.

You can’t pay for or buy a true connection.  Chemistry is chemistry, and not everyone gets along as easily as they do with others.  That’s the reality of life.  You’ll be better off working, living, or sharing time with true “stand by you” type friends rather than pounding your head or living with heartache because you’ve chosen to put yourself in socially incompatible situations simply because you don’t want to be alone.

It’s always wise to take inventory of the people in your life.  It’s irrelevant if they’re family, friends, boyfriends / girlfriends, acquaintances, or colleagues.  If they’re being selfishly unreasonable AND toxic, cut them out of your life IMMEDIATELY !!!

How many of you know someone that BUILDS themselves up by TEARING others down ???

How many of you know someone who is ALWAYS right ???

How many of you know someone who ONLY talks about themselves ???

How many of you know someone who’s a CONSTANT liar ???

How many of you know someone who thinks that they are soooooooooo secretly clever and that others are totally oblivious to their conniving manipulative ways ???

How many of you know someone who always makes you feels guilty or self conscious ???

How many of you know someone who are quick to judge without hearing all the facts first ???

How many of you know someone who NEVER apologizes  –  even when they’re in the wrong ???

How many of you know someone that punishes others by physically taking themselves away and / or employs the silent treatment towards others when things don’t go their way ???

How many of you know someone who shows no mercy or displays the inability to forgive ???

How many of you know someone who goes out of their way to fool others in order to hide their own personal shortcomings ???

 

 

… You don’t know how much time you have on this planet so don’t waste your precious limited moments with people that don’t deserve your company.

 

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Healthy vs. Unhealthy Friendships

By Dr. Jane Bluestein on March 12, 2013

 

Think about someone in your life who leaves an open space for you to be yourself. No one is more valuable. I would rather have a pillar of trust in my life than a pillar of strength — Deepak Chopra

 

1)  Do you have Toxic Friends ??? …

Do you feel drained, agitated, angry, or resentful when you’ve spent time with certain people ???

In unhealthy friendships, one person always seems to give a lot more than the other.

In unhealthy friendships, people ridicule one another, gossip or spread rumors, or act mean to one another.

Unhealthy friendships are threatened when one person grows or changes.

Unhealthy friendships are threatened by other people.

Unhealthy friendships leave you feeling empty and drained

Unhealthy friendships require you to act the way someone else wants you to be in order to be accepted.

Unhealthy friendships only accept certain feelings.

Unhealthy friendships demand conformity

In unhealthy friendships, trusts are broken, secrets are shared, and confidentialities are betrayed.

In unhealthy friendships, only one is committed to the Friendship.

In unhealthy friendships, a toxic friend can’t and won’t share IN your happiness and / or won’t ever celebrate your successes

Unhealthy friendships look to take advantage of another person’s generosity and social standing in order to improve their own.

 

2)  Do you have friends who leave you feeling happy and uplifted ??? …

Healthy friendships are not one-sided. Both people benefit from knowing each other.

Healthy friendships are based on mutual respect.

Healthy friendships allow each other to grow and change.

Healthy friendships are not possessive.

Healthy friendships nourish you and add to your life.

Healthy friendships accept you for who you are.

Healthy friendships allow you to have your feelings.

Healthy friendships respect differences.

Healthy friendships are safe and secure. 

In healthy friendships, both people are committed to the friendship. 

Healthy friendships are not about power or status. 

 

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Protect yourself from Toxic People, Toxic Friendships, and Toxic Relationships.  At ALL costs AVOID …

 

The Blamer – someone who blames you and others for everything that is wrong in their life, thereby forever avoiding responsibility

The Complainer – Nothing seems to work in their life, yet does nothing to change it.  They get their energy from dumping their frustrations on you.

The Drainer – Feels so needy that the conversation always revolves around them and never shows any interest in you.

The Shamer – May reprimand or  belittle you and your ideas in front of others while convincing you their actions are for your / the group’s own good

The Discounter –  Someone who has a strong need to be “Right” and challenges every word that you say to the point of exhaustion … For You

The Gossiper – Gets energy by creating a “Buzz” about others thereby offering no safety in the friendship

 

F.R.I.E.N.D.S  …

F = Fight for You

R = Respect You

I = Include You

E = Encourage You

N = Need You

D = Deserve You

S = Stand By You

 

YOU  Deserve The Very BEST !!!.  Stay away from Liars, Fake Friends, and People who Bring You Down.  Surround Yourself with People Who Truly Care for you, your successes, and your well being.  Fewer that are “True” are BETTER than Alot of “Fairweather” Acquaintances.

Liars know how to turn things around and make it seem like it’s always your fault.  Stay Away from Negative People They seem to HAVE a Problem For Every Solution.

 

Fairweather Friends

Stop giving Your Precious “TIME” to the wrong People.  Life is too short to spend time with people who suck the happiness right out of you.  If someone wants you in their life, they’ll make room for you.  You shouldn’t have to fight for a spot.  Never ever insist yourself to someone who continuously overlooks your worth.  Remember, it’s not the people that stand by your side when you’re at your best, it’s the ones who stand by your side when you’re at your worst that are your True Friends.

Some people will only ‘Love You” as much as they can use you … And … their loyalty ends where the benefits stop.

You see a person’s true colours when you are no longer beneficial to their life.

I hate how some people will smile in your face, lie to you, try to use you THEN get mad when you get smart and stop letting them.

 

… Think of your friends and the people that you know. Then go through the list above and Count the number of times you would put “Healthy” next to their names.

 

… Take a look at your role as a friend. In what ways are you a healthy friend ??? – In what ways are you an unhealthy friend ???

 

Before we say bye for a while, I urge every single one of you to look not Only on your own interests BUT also on the interests of others … And … never entangle yourselves within the snare of an angry wrathful human being.  Bad company corrupts good character and ruins morals.

The Best THREE Things that a Person could ever lose in Life are Negative Stress, Unhealthy Fair-Weather Friendships … and … Belly Weight  =  Happy New Years “2019” Everybody !!!

 

 

… Know that I wish you ALL a Great Life !!!

 

 

Have a Fantastic Day – You Deserve It !!!

 

Nelson Beltijar
www.ThePositiveDrip.com

 

 

Ps.  Let me leave you with this quote from Commander Ulysses S. Grant – the 18th President of The United States of America …

 

“The friend in my adversity I shall always cherish most.  I can better trust those who helped to relieve the gloom of my dark hours than those who are so ready to enjoy with me the sunshine of my prosperity”

 

 

Remember, ThePositiveDrip.com CARES about Your Success